The Art of War, Real Estate, and Why Experience Still Wins in Real Estate

You know… fourteen years old, full of angst, convinced the world was wildly misunderstood and probably wrong about most things.

That was me.

My rebel side was primed. Authority was suspicious. Rules were optional. And one long, painfully boring summer left me with too much time and not enough patience.

So I did the most on-brand thing possible for a restless teenager who thought they already knew everything. I picked up a book.

That book was "The Art of War" by Sun Tzu.

I didn’t know it at the time, but that book cracked something open in my brain. It wasn’t about war. It was about preparation. Awareness. Positioning. Control. Winning before things ever got loud.

Fast forward a few decades.

Thirty-plus years of sales. Client-focused service. Negotiations. Business strategy. Wins that felt effortless. Losses that stung enough to teach real lessons.

And here’s the strange part.

Those same principles from that book? They’re everywhere.

Especially in real estate.

Every Battle Is Won Before It Is Ever Fought

This is where most people get it wrong.

They think buying or selling a home is about the showing, the offer, or the negotiation at the table.

It’s not.

The outcome is decided long before any of that happens.

Pricing strategy. Market timing. Offer structure. Financing choices. Exit plans you hope you never need but are grateful to have.

That’s the real work.

After decades in this business, I can tell you this with confidence: buyers who skip preparation lose leverage before they ever write an offer. Sellers who “test the market” usually end up letting the market test them back.

A professional doesn’t show up hoping things work out. We show up with a plan so hope isn’t required.

Know the Battlefield and Know Yourself

Social media has made everyone an expert.

Memes, hot takes, and comment sections love to throw shade at real estate agents. Apparently, anyone with a phone and a strong opinion knows exactly what we do and what we’re “worth.”

Sure. We’re human. We make mistakes.

But the good ones? The best ones?

We learn. We adapt. And we understand that you’re not negotiating against a person—you’re negotiating against inventory, incentives, financing rules, timelines, and pressure you didn’t see coming.

Knowing that battlefield is the difference between confidence and guessing.

And guessing gets expensive.

Experience teaches you when to push, when to pause, and when silence is the strongest move in the room. That doesn’t come from theory. It comes from being there when it mattered.

He Who Occupies the Battlefield First Controls the Advantage

Momentum is real, whether people want to admit it or not.

In real estate, the first few days tell the story. Buyers are watching. Other agents are watching. The market is making up its mind.

A strong launch creates urgency. Urgency creates leverage. Leverage creates better results.

Miss that window and suddenly you’re reacting instead of leading. Chasing instead of controlling.

This is why seasoned professionals obsess over preparation and positioning. We’ve seen what happens when you don’t.

We’ve been on this battlefield first for a long time.

Why This Story Still Matters

The irony isn’t lost on me.

A bored, rebellious fourteen-year-old reads a strategy book for no real reason. Thirty years later, those same principles quietly guide how I protect clients, negotiate outcomes, and navigate markets that constantly change.

Real estate isn’t casual. It’s one of the largest financial decisions most people ever make. And despite what social media says, this isn’t a game where shortcuts usually win.

The Art of War was never about fighting. It was about thinking ahead, controlling variables, and avoiding unnecessary damage.

That’s what great professionals do.

You can step onto the battlefield alone.

Or you can work with someone who’s been studying it, adapting to it, and surviving it for decades—and plans to stay right here long after the noise fades.

That choice matters more than most people realize.

~Big Ern

About the Author

Ernie “Big Ern” Becker is a Broker, Owner of United Real Estate Queen City, and a Master Sales & Negotiation Strategist (MSTC) serving Charlotte, NC and Fort Mill, SC. He helps buyers, sellers, and real estate investors make smart moves with strategy-first guidance and negotiation-forward execution.
Why notwork with Ernie?: Contact Big Ern Today!

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